Things Other People Want Me To Change
1. Acne. L, my lover, has made it blatantly clear that he is repulsed by my bacne. When it was pretty bad he wouldn’t even have sex with me without my shirt on. I mean, he didn’t even simply NOT take it off. He would say, outright, “take off your pants, leave your shirt on.” As if I’m not going to KNOW what that’s about. And later he said to me “when you are 25 you are going to be drop-dead georgous, you’ll finally grow into yourself, and your acne will clear up.” For fucks sake, this summer, its ON. I’m going to the pharmacy RIGHT now to fill my birth control perscription and the new anti-biotic that the dermatologist gave me.
2. My belly weight. Both Dev and L have tried to have sex with me in front of a mirror, and then CLEARLY changed their minds. Nobody compliments me on my body anymore. I mean, my tits, my ass, even my legs. But my tummy is very hush-hush. I’ve decided that, in addition to my extreme dieting, I’m going to add ONE tummy workout to my routine (I fucking HATE working out, so one is pushing it). Its called a pinwheel, and I’m not exactly sure what it is, but I guess I’ll find out.
3. Not entirely sure. N, my best friend, said that she showed my Facebook pictures to some guy, and he was unimpressed. Then she said “you need to get some hot pictures of yourself on facebook.” How do I take that? Am I unattractive overall? Seriously?
